Health and Wellbeing, Building on Positive Relationships

Building on Positive Relationships (BPR) is a relational approach which has been adapted by North Ayrshire council from the principles and practice of Non-violent Resistance (NVR). BPR is an intervention aimed to support adults who work with children and young people who demonstrate a range of harmful, challenging and resistant behaviours.Within North Ayrshire the BPR programme builds on our current relational and nurturing approaches to support educational establishments and families.

The ideas and philosophy behind BPR originally come from the work of non-violent direct actions applied by Gandhi, Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks to bring about political change. The founder Haim Omer (2004), redeveloped the principles to be used by families to support change through non-violent and relational means. These methods have been applied within various community and family settings to support adults, children and young people.

BPR provides a trauma informed and systematic programme for adults which is delivered by trained professionals.The principles of BPR are centred around relationships and the importance of understanding behaviours. When faced with challenging behaviours unhelpful patterns of escalation can develop. The programme explores key concepts such as shame, blocked care/trust and self-care. Adults are supported to consider their own needs and wellbeing in the first instance.Supportive networks are established to help give parents and professionals a sense of optimism that things can change and get better, improving adult wellbeing and school/family dynamics. BPR also aims to address feelings of helplessness by building adult presence.

Through the BPR programme fundamental principles of Resit, Persist, Unite and Repair helps adults to overcome and address harmful behaviours within the home or within education.

BPR/ NVR Key Guiding Principles include:

• Focus on the relationship and understanding behaviours
• Supporting adult needs
• Non-violent and de-escalatory
• An end to cycles of shame and isolation
• Active resistance, raising adultpresence
• Strategic and planned approaches

Educational Programme

Promoting Positive Relationships (PPR) and Whole School Nurture (WSN) are NAC Universal approach across educational establishments. PPR and WSN provide the universal foundations forBuilding on Positive Relationships. Aspects of BPR can be considered universal such as Unite and Repair although many of the strategies within BPR are intended to support targeted work with children and young people who are displaying significant difficultiesBPR provides additional tools when we feel that traditional strategies are not working as well.

All of NAC secondary schools and many of the primary schools have been supported by the one day education programme which covers core aspects such as:

• Blocked Care
• Accommodation
• New Authority
• Resist/Persist/Unite/Repair
• BPR Passport including relational gestures, the basket technique; support networks; de-esclation and scripts and Statement of Change

The NAC BPR Educational Programme is currently being updated. Should you wish to find out more about the programme please speak to your EP.

Families’ Programme

The families’ programme is currently being delivered by a range of professionals from within North Ayrshire Council which include: The Family Centred Wellbeing Team, Area Inclusion Workers, Rosemount Workers.

The parent programme runs for 8 weeks with an additional call back session.

Week 1: Introduction to New Authority and Self Care

• Introduction
• What is New Authority?
• Parenting discussion
• Mental health and wellbeing discussion

Week 2: Exploring behaviours and de-escalation

• Looking behind the behaviour
• De-escalation strategies

Week 3: Building parental presence

• Parenting and New Authority
• Parental presence
• Relational gestures

Week 4: Complicating Factors impacting on Parental Presence

• Blocked care and blocked trust
• Shield of shame
• Siblings and family dynamics
• Relational gestures

Week 5: Prioritising behaviours and the Statement of Change

• Re-visit “looking behind behaviours”
• Baskets and prioritise behaviours
• Rainbow basket
• Preparing statement of change

Week 6: Statement of change

• Statement of change

Week 7: Supporters and the message campaign

• Supporters
• The Message Campaign

Week 8: Sit with and Vigilant Care

• Building parental presence
• Connecting “sit-with”
• Vigilant Care
• Review and reflection

Follow up session

Review and reflection

Key BPR Techniques

These BPR techniques apply in both educational and family settings although they may be implemented slightly differently in both settings.

De-escalation: “Strike while the iron is cold”

This includes: waiting until situations are calm; preparing autopilot statements and delivering these with a quiet tone and thoughtful body language. Focus on ‘start’ behaviours rather than ‘stop’ behaviours.

New Authority and Adult Presence

For parents e-establishing your parental presence means reminding your child that you love them and will be there for them no matter what, however you will resist their unacceptable behaviour. For professionals, this requires the adult to have a calm and supportive presence whilst establishing clear boundaries and setting appropriate and logical consequences for behaviour when required.

Relational Gestures

This is a planned and personal gesture which will show you love or have unconditional regard for a child and want to rebuild the relationship. They continue regardless of behaviours.

Statement of Change

A planned statement made to clearly outline to children and young people what behaviour has to change. The adult begins by telling thechild about the stand they are going to take and the commitment to resist their behaviour. Where possible, it can be helpful to get a clear view from the child on how they feel their behaviour can change but the adult should still demonstrate their commitment to changing the behaviour even when the child is not able to commit to this.

Referral Process

If you are a parent who is already engaged with a service such as The Family Centred Wellbeing Team, Area Inclusion Worker, or Rosemount Worker, you can speak to your worker directly about the parent programme. If you are not currently supported by any of these agencies you should speak to your child’seducational establishment. The educational establishment can make a referral to the central BPR team regarding the parent programme.

Download this Building on Positive Relationships for Families leaflet (pdf).

View our Building on Positive Relationships Powerpoint Presentations (password-protected page).